Entertainment Jokes

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Man - Doctor, Doctor! My wooden leg is giving me a headache!
Doctor: Why?
Man: Because my wife keeps hitting me on the head with it.

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WHAT IS THE HEIGHT OF FRIENDSHIP?
ANSWER - IT IS WHEN YOUR BEST FRIEND RUNS AWAY WITH YOUR WIFE AND YOU ARE REALLY WORRIED ABOUT YOUR FRIEND.

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What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you?
Run like Hell....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.

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PROFESSOR : Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jantey ho?
MUNNA BHAI : Gandhi bahut jabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin malum ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.
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CIRCUIT : Bhai, Bapu NE bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.
MUNNA BHAI : Aye Circuit, who Sunita ka baap aya hai terayko dund rehla hai.
CIRCUIT : Bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai, kheti karneko.
MUNNA BHAI : Par Circuit, abhi to TU bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.
CIRCUIT : Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.

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wife: i will die.
husband: i will also die.
wife:why do you want to die?
husband:mujhse dher sari khushi bardasht nahi hogi.
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maa:beta jyada badbad karne se insaan pagal ho jataa hai.
bachchaa: achhaa maa ! mein apne masterji se kahunga, puraa din badbad karte rahte hai.

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sir: bachchon kasam khaao ki kabhi sharab,cigratte ko haath nahi lagaaoge.
bachchen: thhik hai sir.
sir: kabhi ladkiyon ko nahi chhedoge.
bachche: ok sir.
sir: kasam khaao ki desh ke liye jaan doge.
bachche: ji haa sir, vaise bhi aisi jaan rakh kar bhi kya fayda hai.

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once a nrwly appointed teacher ,entered a class-room and started asking each student ,their names and what they like the most. she strated asking from the boys first ,all the boys told their names and they said that they like to watch bubbles in the bath tub. the teacher was very surprised to know the same answer from the boys. then she asked the girls their names . the girl sitting on the last bench said that her name was bubbles.

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You are a Dog!
Kyun bura laga naa?
Par bura mat mano.
Dog means D=Demand, O=Of, G=Good people like you.

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While being interviewed an actress was asked whether
she inended to get married in near future.
The lady replied, "Never!, I will follow in the
footsteps of my mother. Like her,I will remain single."

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1. NIIT : Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output.

3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses.

4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions.

5. INFOSYS : Inferior Offline Systems.

6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping.

7. BAAN : Beggers Assosciation And Nerds.

8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines.

9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly.

10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors.

11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings.

12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible.

13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort.

14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers.

15. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go.

16. DELL : Deplorable Equipment & LackLusture.

17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.

18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India.

19. PCL : Poor Computers Ltd.

20. SPARC : Simply Poor And Redundant Computers.

21. SUN : Surely Useless Novelties.

22. CRAY : Cry Repeatedly After a Year.

23. TUL : Troubles UnLimited.

24. ICIM : Impossible Computers In Maintenance.

25. TI : Tactless Idiots.

26. BPL : Below Poverty Line.

27. HP : Hungry people.